Sunday, 24 May 2026
2026 Week 21
Sunday, 17 May 2026
2026 Week 20
Wednesday, 13 May 2026
Tales of Toxic Independence
A while ago, I read about the concept of toxic independence, where a person goes out of their way to avoid asking for or accept help, even when they need it and it would be willingly offered. This is likely rooted in some kind of trauma from younger years. I don't want to think too hard about that part because this is a trait I have really started to see reflected in myself.
So - today's tale. I was hauling my little cart of archive materials to a classroom for our after school archive club. I bought the little cart so I don't have to keep borrowing the caretakers' cart. I brought it to the room, which was up a small flight of three steps. Somebody passed. 'Do you want a hand? It's not very heavy, we can lift it up.' 'No, no,' I replied, 'I'll be fine.'
For, at the top of the steps, I had long noted a couple of eyelets - it was clear to me that the platform lifted up and, I decided, it was going to be a ramp. I would just wheel the cart up. No need for anyone to help.
I positioned myself behind the eyelets and prized them out. I yanked hard - one side came free, but the other was stuck. Repeat but the other side came free. I decided it must have been a long time since anybody did this. Nobody knows it's here! I thought. I wiggled myself into a better position, channelled all my deadlift training and yeeted the ramp up, whereupon it became obvious that it was not a ramp but a hatch, concealing a dark pit that had clearly not seen sunlight for at least half a century, and into which my phone had tumbled, thrown out of my pocket by the force of my yeeting.
At exactly this point, the caretaker appeared around the corner. Sometimes the universe messaging is just too strong to ignore, so I allowed him to retrieve my phone since he was not wearing a skirt ('Not today, anyway,' he replied) and there was the filth of ages in the pit. He resealed it, and whatever plagues were threatening to waft free, for probably another century.
This could have all been avoided if I'd accepted the offer of help in the first place. I sheepishly requested help to get the cart back down at the end of the session.
You really think I'd have learned by now but no.
Tuesday, 12 May 2026
Tuesday Ten
Sunday, 10 May 2026
2026 Week 19
Thursday, 7 May 2026
Throwaway Thursday - Miss Selfridge body spray
An occasional series that I might also title, 'Things in my house that are basically rubbish but I am a borderline hoarder and cannot bring myself to throw them out'. The idea is to memorialise such things here and then bin them for good.
Another scent memory: Miss Selfridge body spray, in Heart.
I was never massively into body spray. We all had a thing for Impulse O2, obviously, being 90s children, but even then I was fairly sparing in my application. I have strong memories of Zoe standing and spraying herself in a circular motion, like she was creating a tornado of the scent, which is probably why that scent is just an immediate transport back to that time (or would be, if it were still available). But as a very sweaty person, I was mainly using Right Guard in some less overpowering scent, in a desperate attempt to stop my arm pits from soaking all my outfits - a fight I have long since given up on.
Thus, I don't really remember using this body spray. It's about a third full. I loved Miss Selfridge cosmetics and still appreciate the aluminium packaging, which might bear responsibility for the scent lasting as long as it has. I have no idea what the scent is, but it takes me back to late 90s, possibly as I was moving out of home at 17, living in a bedsit in London and going clubbing with my boyfriend's friends every week; maybe even a bit later, and uni.
It smells of vanilla and then maybe a bit fruity, like jelly sweets, or maybe something a bit floral (I'm terrible at doing scent notes) - it isn't exactly edible but it smells vaguely juicy. It is funny that I have held on to it for so long because, I have to say, sniffing it doesn't flood me with a happy feeling. I don't know what it is. That gap year before uni was not my happiest year, so I guess that would kind of make sense.
Just had a full on stare for a couple of minutes, thinking of those nights out that this scent probably accompanied. Thank god, thank all deities, that digital cameras and social media were not a thing. I'd either have had a lot less fun at the time, due to a shred of self-preservation; or (more likely) I'd have had a lot less fun afterwards, when it all went up online.
Wednesday, 6 May 2026
The Remains of 13 Wonderwools
- 3 skeins of grey camel/silk blend from Knitwitches
- 1 skein of blue cashmere laceweight, also Knitwitches
- 1 skein of pink alpaca silk cashmete from Artyarns
- Many buttons
- Some red Knitwitches merino-angora blend, probably DK
- 2 skeins Blue Heron sparkly yarn - I did wind this and start something but it never made it much past the cast on
- More buttons
- 1 skein of plain sock yarn and 1 skein of Jawoll rainbow for some colourwork socks I have never made
- 2 skeins of Artisan linen/silk laceweight - wound, cast on and sitting in a project bag for about a decade
- A couple of skeins of brown Laalbear worsted - I have knitted two project with this yarn, so sort of doesn't count, but some remains
- 2 balls of Bigwigs angora/merino blend
- Obviously more buttons
- Roving - 400g; for thrumming, not yet done
- 1 skein fivemoons Nanna Not Sock
- Artesano BFL DK, 11 skeins in navy
- A couple of skeins of Laalbear Naturals in cream - same as above, I have knitted a project with some of this
- 4 skeins Knitwitches Seriously Gorgeous BFL/Silk/Cashmere
- 1 skein Knitwitches aran silk
- I'm just going to stop saying buttons
- 500g aran cashmere from Knitwitches
- Buttons
- 5 skeins of green Triskelion
- 4 skeins of a blue blend DK from Owl About Yarns - I wound this but I have been putting off using it because I'm afraid it might have been mothed. It's in a bag with some moth strips
- 1 Zauberball
- 1 ball of Pook in a long gradient
- A few buttons
- 2 skeins of Riverknits 4-ply in Starry Night
- 1 rainbow gradient set, also from Riverknits
- 1 more skein of that Riverknits Starry Night so I had enough for a jumper (plan well-conceived...)
- 1 Riverknits blue gradient set
- 1 skein of delicious beige Triskelion 4-ply. The plan was (is?) to use this to make a shawl, with the blue gradient
- 2 skeins of Woolly Wumpkin very saturated red 4-ply
- 20 50g skeins of fivemoons grey 4-ply
- A Latvian mitten kit - this is OTNs and is sort of my current project (along with the other current project)
- A skein of DK Merino from Penrhallt Alpacas
- A sale grab bag of 5 skeins from fivemoons.
- A skein of DK merino from Lay Family yarns and a matching pom pom, to make a hat for the SIL - I have decided that SIL is not knitworthy, so I need to find someone else to make this hat for
- Some rainbow yarn - two teeny skeins for adding a single rainbow stripe to the cuffs of some socks or mittens, and a ball of DK for some mitts
- The yarn for a 4-ply jumper for Mr Z
- The needle-felting kit
- Some neons with a UV nep from Sealy MacWheely
- A Starry Nights minis set from the Yarn Artist
- 2 skeins of bird yarn from Mothy and Squid in the robin colourway - wound, sitting in a bag somewhere
- A 45 colour cashmere kit (plus the undyed for swatching) that will knit into a three-dimensional shawl
Monday, 4 May 2026
Wonderwool 2026
- A kit to knit two otters and a pattern book from Sincerely Louise. What a delightful stall. I had a good chat with the artist and her partner on both days, all about Game of Wool and her famous octopus, featured on Tom Daly's shoulder. There were too many kits I wanted but the otters won. The word on the street is that she might have pigeons next year.
- Top middle - a block printed silk scarf from a clothing stand called Running Stitches. They did well out of us as April bought a jacket from there on the Saturday that sent most of us running to the stall to see what she had the next day.
- Middle middle - 18 mini skeins from Wee Yarns. They had 150 colours laid out in baskets, it was just divine. The package on the right is a pre-organised fade that I bought to knit a scarf for our Brazilian cleaner at work; the one of the left is an orange fade I put together myself, plus a couple of greens. The greens are part of my seemingly unending quest to find the right green yarn to go with some brown sportweight I took out of Kat's stash last year.
- Bottom middle - three skeins from Sealy McWheely. The middle one is navy with a copper glimmer: very unusual, and the thing I decided on Saturday night that I would be most sad not to get hold of. I went straight back on Sunday morning and she only had one skein left! Four in the DK, so I did dither for a while, but then decided I probably don't want a whole jumper of sparkle, so I bought some plain navy for striping.
- If you look closely at the top skein of the navy, you'll see a little vintage pearl-handled pin sticking out.
- Top right - project bag from An Caitin Beag. It has a contrast cat lining. In the middle there is also a pin from her stand that says 'Deeds not purrs'.
- Middle right - a needle felting kit to make three robins. I had decided against this, as I still have the needle felting kit for the door wreath from 2024, but then someone pointed out I could add robins to the wreath and I also remembered that, this October half term, I WON'T be working on a Masters, so I bought it. There's also a teeny notion purse and a crab brooch.
- Bottom right - a kit from An Caitin Beag to make a cowl. It's the softest thing. This was originally meant for the cleaner but I like to have options.





