2026 Week 25

It's been a week of exam work, with a little dissertation work wedged in around the edges. Oh, and school, obvs. 

School is weird. What I'm doing looks like it's being successful, I'm told by my boss it's being successful, but the trust don't want me to continue doing it, so my role might change for next year. I'm trying to resist this, for a variety of reasons, but ultimately need to remember something I say often to other people: I work for them, they get to choose what I do. A few conversations have been had. In one of these conversations, I plucked up the courage to tell the Head that I think next year needs to be my last year in teaching for a while. I've been thinking it for so long without saying it that I could feel myself blushing and hear the blood in my ears. I know this isn't the same as resigning and I'll still be in role for another year, but I feel like I've started the countdown. I don't want to leave my school but I don't think I can continue to work for this MAT. I don't have it in my to lie down and shut up. 

So, a lot of the week has also been spent mentally calculating my living expenses and mourning the future loss of my monthly salary. I will be financially fine but I kind of like being paid every month, you know? I expect interesting projects will come along once I have capacity for them. Mr Z has also pointed out that I haven't been particularly happy at work for about two years, which I hadn't really noticed (I realise how stupid this sounds but sometimes it does take someone else to say these things out loud to recognise them). So I think I am ready to start letting it go. 

I spent Wednesday at the university for a training day, with my good friend Jonty who does my job at another school, so we get this nice catch up every year now. A couple of other friends I haven't seen for a while were there as well, so nice to see people, especially at this time of year when it feels like all my communication is with people I mark with and all by email or text. 

I went to the sauna, to hot yoga and for a quarry swim. No Sunday gym, I am out of the habit now but I am not being down on myself about it, it will come back when I've got through the dissertation work. We continued with the second season of The Pitt until we ran out of episodes; I've been watching the new series of Amandaland which is almost too awkward for me to cope with, but I love Lucy Punch in it. No knitting. Bit of Dracula reading. 

TLDR - not a very interesting week but it might turn out to be an important one, in the long run.